For many females loosing a boyfriend hurts emotionally and mentally. I've spent many a night crying into my pillow, asking my friends why? Women hurt but trust me men do too. I always assumed that because he wasn't calling me every day. Or crying down the phone and looking down hearted when I bumped into him that he was fine....WRONG!!!
I've learned that some men have a delay when it comes to break-ups. Females will cry, cry and cry some more. We are getting the emotional heart ache out our system. We are releasing the pain by constantly sharing our experience. It helps that we tend to have a strong network around us, plus the fact that we love to talk. Men on the other hand will try to bury their feelings. They will distract themselves with any and everything. It's not that they don't have anyone to talk too. I just don't think they like to go to that place of discussing how they feel. Some men will sit on their emotions hoping it will go away. By this time women are slowly getting over the mourning process when the man has just started it.
A man's girlfriend is usually his main confidant. Yes he has family and friends but I doubt they will know half the things his woman does. He will lean and confide in her more than he realises. So when she's gone he feels a little lost and has no one to share those feelings with. Plus society has always portrayed that men have to be tough. Cry in public…..oh no. That's a sign of weakness. Another reason I feel that men struggle with their emotions. Men do feel pain they just deal with it differently.
Men tend to get angry and frustrated when a break-up has been initiated by the woman (depending on the reasons). Women tend to prepare themselves mentally for a split weeks if not months before the decision is made. For men it comes as a big shock. Although the lady in his life has probably been talking for weeks about the state of the relationship. They are oblivious to why such a harsh decision has been made. Hence the feeling of betrayal and why it sometimes takes them longer to get over a break-up.
Men like women don't like the hassle of starting again. They've invested all that time and effort into someone and now they've gone. We all get comfortable and like the fact that out other half's know us so well. No more first dates trying to impress each other. No more trying to hide your flaws, acting on your best behaviour. The whole dating and getting to know you process is just as long for men. It gets to a point when they just want to settle down and have someone to come home too. EVERY man wants this at some point in their life.
Just because your ex-boyfriend isn't knocking down your door, professing his undying love for you or dropping flowers off at your work place. The typical cliché scenes that are portrayed everyday in films. It does not mean he's not hurting. It's just as hard for men as it is for women to deal with a break-up.