Wednesday, December 22, 2010

My Top 5 Relationship Deal Breakers.

We're approaching a new year and most will be making a list of resolutions. A few of you may be thinking about your relationship deal breakers. I understand couples will have different opinions on certain things but some values need to tarry up. Here are some red flags that I can't over look.....

RUDENESS -Disrespectful to my friends and family. I know people have their differences but that doesn't call for being rude. It gives me a good indication of the way he treats his parents and friends. If he can't treat others the way he wants to be treated then see ya. I've got friends whose boyfriend I'll say hello to and they go down the route of selective hearing.

DISHONESTY - Now I understand people tell white lies from time to time. However there is a big difference between my favourite colour is blue and I manage my own company. I'm talking about compulsive lying! I don't understand why people do it? Sometimes it gets so bad that the person being dishonest can't differentiate lies from the truth. It indicates that your partner has no hesitation building up your expectations and constantly letting you down. I can honestly say it's horrible to be in a relationship without any trust. No trust means no relationship! 

MORE THAN 1 BABY MOTHER- I'm not trying to judge any guy that has several children with a number of women. Nevertheless I can't see myself with a man who has more than 1 baby mother, considering I don't have any children myself. I can't be dealing with Shenika calling the house stating that my partner can't see his child this weekend. Just thinking about it gives me a headache. I's not always as stereo typical as I just made out but I hate drama and try not to associate with it.

RELIGIOUS DIFFERENCES - Considering I'm a Christian it would help if my partner was on the same page and shared the same religious beliefs. I don't necessarily want a man whose going to be preaching on the pulpit per se but we need to have the same values. As sooner or later we're going to approach some humps in the road. Whilst I'll be getting on my knees to pray my partner will say 'don't worry honey, fingers crossed'.

LACK OF COMMITMENT- There are several different elements when it comes to commitment. My main concern is when I'm with someone and we're not progressing. I once dated a guy who after 6 months still had not introduced me to any family members or work colleagues. They probably thought he was single for all I know. Although we went out (meals/drinks) I never got to test whether he'd introduce me as his 'girlfriend' or refer to me by name (always a good indication). He never professed it as Steve Harvey would say. He never included me in his talks about the future and never made time for me. I knew deep down it wasn't right but I hoped things would change.

What are some of your relationship deal breakers?


  1. one of mine would be arrogance. I can't stand people who think they are above everybody else and have no consideration for others, huge turn off.

    And someone that constantly spoke about themself and after 3 months wouldn't be able to name one thing their partner is passionate about, that sucks too.

    with your last point, I don't know whether the 6 month thing might have been such a bad thing. Nowadays people are quick to introduce girlfriends/boyfriends to family, only for the relationship to end. I understand if you felt he wasn't really 'in' the relationship, but just generally speaking it's nice to date someone for a while without the pressures of family etc.

  2. I agree arrogance is a very big turn off.

    I'm pretty private and don't like to broadcast my business to the world. However after a while maybe more than 6 months you got to test the waters. See if the relationship is really going anywhere.


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